Monday, 15 September 2008

I'm A Bitch!

While most of us either still do or have had times when we’ve wanted to portray ourselves as being ‘perfect’, that fact is that none of us are. We all have our personality traits and the law of averages dictates that some of those are bound to be what society consider negative.

I have my share.

One of them is that I can be quite bitchy, although in a subtle kind of way. The kind of way that’s stabs just a little, but enough to draw blood.

I don’t like it and would much prefer that I wasn’t but the truth is, I actually enjoy it. Sounds awful, doesn’t it? It isn’t a side of me that I deliberately chose though - I didn’t wake up one morning and decide I’d be a bitch.

I think peer and family influences have a lot to say in why some people are bitchy and others not so much although how bitchy we get probably depends on how susceptible we are to outside influences rather than making our own choices.

I really don’t like doing anything that I know will hurt somebody else in some way, let alone doing it deliberately. Luckily I did eventually ‘wake up’ one day and decided that I’d give a lot more thought to the consequences of my bitchiness than I had before and have gradually learned to curb it considerably. A mini-bitch still lives on though and to be honest, I don’t mind her too much.

Sharon J


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emmani said...

Hi Sharon,
You and I must be online at the same time because once again I'm the first to comment!
I think us girls all have a bit of bitch in us... we have to protect our 'pride' and be a little territorial, whether it's our man, our kids or our image...
My mums partner, born in Ethiopia, British mother, American citizen at 20, came to the UK about 6 years ago. He cannot believe how much the Brits bitch, put each other down and ignore each others feelings. Even close family are conditioned into sarcasm and bitchiness. When he first confided a problem to a colleague, he was shocked at the answer... "Oh well, never mind, don't worry about it!'
We don't realise it, but we Brits are a very unfeeling bunch of sarcastic, bitchy beings!

I think you're lovely Sharon!

shabby chic said...

Hi Sharon I love the wine !. I am pretty laid back most of the time, but I feel sometimes if someone annoys me, I have to say something!, if its somethings thats ruffled my feathers. Wether it be to defend my position or get a point across. Sometimes though i distance myself from people if they make me feel like being horrid!(in otherwords a bith !!)

Catz said...

Hi Sharon!

I think we are all capable of being bitchy at times, kind of goes with the territory of being a woman (mind you I know of some men that could be very bitchy)

Mr C's Nana, lovely and wise lady who we all miss so much, used to say "least said soonest mended" and encouraged us all to count to 10 and think first as once we had said something it was difficult to take it back. Not always easy though, hopefully I have got better as I've aged!

Just keep on being the lovely encouraging and thoughtful lady you are Sharon, it's why I and others keep coming to visit and read your blog!

Sharon J said...

@ Emmani. Maybe it's a defence mechanism that's programmed into us or something. Although that wouldn't explain why Ethiopians aren't bitchy. Or perhaps they are, just more subtly so your mum's partner didn't notice so much? Norwegians are certainly just as bitchy as us so it can't be just a British thing.

I wouldn't go as far as to say we're a generally unfeeling nation but some are definitely more so than others.

Re your last line. That's easy to say when you've never actually met me ;)

@ Shabby Chic. I'm also pretty laid back most of the time but if somebody gets my goat, I'll generally give them a little stab although nowadays less so than earlier. Distancing yourself is definitely the better alternative :)

Sharon J said...

Hi Catz. We must've been posting our comments at the same time :)

I don't really feel bad about the mini-bitch in me - I realise that's just a part of my personality and hopefully certain other positive traits make up for it. From your comments, it would seem so :)

Your hubby's nana was very wise. She sounds a lot like my mum, who I look up to in so many ways.

wombat064 said...

Dear Sharon, from a mans point of view (my own) having a litte bitchiness is Ok in a Lady.

My theory goes something like this...

A Lady would never admit to passing gas from any part of her body, therefore must occaisonally have a little bitch or She will BLOW UP..
Its a Ladies relief valve and thats ok its what keeps relationships alive.

Keep up the good blog
Love from Australia

Sharon J said...

LOL, Wombat. That's one way of looking at it ;)

Jennifer said...

Hi Sharon!
I've got it too but Simon, being British and refined to my American ways simply calls me 'a bit spicy sometimes'. That suits me fine! :D


Sharon J said...

I love Simon's description, Jennifer. Spicy sounds so much better than bitchy :)

Pat said...

You're not alone. We wouldn't be women if we were not bitches.

donna said...

wow, i admire your honesty. i think we're all probably as bad as one another

Sharon J said...

@ pat. Well I guess there's some truth in that :)

@ donna. I don't think you can be entirely comfortable with yourself unless you're honest about who you are. I think there's definitely a bitch in all of us (women) but some are far worse than others. I'd like to think I'm not in the 'mega bitch' category.